By The Reverend Mrs. Silence DoGood
Dear Editor,
One day last summer as I was driving past Charlie Winslow’s farm I pulled to the side of the road and stopped my car. It was midday. At the southern end of his lower pasture is a small stand of trees. With the sun overhead there was ample shade under the trees for eight of his beef cows to rest. Only one was standing. I looked at the cows avoiding the hot sun and I thought how smart they were. They were avoiding an uncomfortable situation. Right before my eyes was an idea for my following Sunday’s sermon.
I named my sermon Shade. I described in detail the bucolic scene of the cows resting in the shade of summer foliage. The shade was a safe and cool space to be and it was the cows’ natural instinct to seek comfort. And then I spoke about all of us. That we, like the cows, should avoid people and places that make us uncomfortable. But often we don’t.
I asked my congregation to think of times when they were uncomfortable. I had them think of whether there was a shady space that could have helped them during these times. Could they have moved to another location? Could they have changed the subject? Could they have taken the initiative and done something to make the situation better? I explained that there is no guilt in wanting to make oneself comfortable.
I gave the sermon twice as we are still holding service at the Unity Grange Hall and we need two services to accommodate our congregation. When our new church is finished being built we will probably only need one service.
I had forgotten about that sermon until Mr. John Dennis, the Principal at our High School, made an appointment to see me. He said that it was very urgent and that it dealt with one of his students. I invited him into the parlor at the parsonage. I had already prepared some green tea and I had my home made oatmeal cookies laid out waiting for him. I never expected what he told me.
He asked me if I knew Ms. Blousy Miller the seventeen year old high school senior. I explained that I know her parents as they are members of my congregation. I said that I have seen her several times at my Sunday service with her parents but that I have never met her. He also asked me if I knew the meaning of “throwing shade.” I said that I didn’t.
“Blousy’s teachers have had complaints from other students’ parents that she is horrible to their children. She publicly criticizes them, she makes sarcastic remarks about them, and she actually expresses contempt for them.” He went on. “She rolls her eyes when her classmates are speaking. She laughs at nothing funny. And she inappropriately asks for evidence when her classmates are speaking about their experiences. These are examples of throwing shade.”
I innocently asked what I can do to help. Mr. Dennis said that Blousy blames you for her conduct because you were advocating “shade” in one of your summer sermons. I recounted my actual sermon about the cows sitting in the shade. I told Mr. Dennis that my words could not have inspired Blousy.
I discussed this matter with my loving husband Willie. He suggested that I give another sermon about shade. At some point I should open an umbrella over my head to demonstrate what happens under an umbrella on sunny days. Shade. Not throwing shade.
I didn’t follow his advice but I did invite Mr. and Mrs. Miller and Blousy for tea in the parsonage. At one point during our friendly discussion I opened an umbrella over my head to demonstrate shade. That was the only meaning of my semon.
Several weeks later I checked with Mr. Dennis to learn about Blousy’s conduct. He said that she stopped “throwing shade” but now always walks around school carrying an umbrella. Sometimes closed. Sometimes open even on sunny days.
Amen.
The Reverend Mrs. Silence DoGood
Senior Pastor
Executive Director
President
Chairman
Choir Master (part-time)
The First Church of God’s Love
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